Monday, October 23, 2006

You know you are a Delhiite when...

You know you're a Delhiite when...
  1. You don't want to admit that you were actually born in Meerut.
  2. Only Black Label or Jack Daniel will do at your teenage son's B'day.
  3. You don't dare serve anything other than Blue Label at your own do.
  4. Your secretary has a better mobile than your counterpart in Chennai.
  5. You try botox because there's a trail sale on at the local Kaya clinic.
  6. You order Diet Coke with butter chicken for a "light" lunch.
  7. Your monthly liquor bill exceeds your declared income.
  8. You've visited Sakura twice and now you're an expert on Japanese food.
  9. You gush about Masala Art but your heart lies with Moti Mahal.
  10. You ask the fruit seller down the road to get you only organic fruits.
  11. You go to Bangkok for an office offsite and organise a Sardar DJ.
  12. You don't know whether your office will be open or sealed tomorrow.
  13. Your party list has a politician, bureaucrat or DCP, in that order.
  14. You have a sarson da saag lunch party catered by Maurya to declare winter.
  15. You jump up to dance whenever your disc plays Punjabi songs.
  16. You can boast of atleast two relatives or contacts in every major ministry.
  17. An astrologer, numerologist and tarot card reader are on your speed dail.
  18. You prefer to massage chocolate all over your body rather than eat it.
  19. You think VFM is the name of the nwest mall in town.
  20. Your black Toyota Camry has bullet proof windows.
  21. You drive to the neighbourhood park for your morning walk.
  22. You're at a fab party and all the good looking young men around you are gay(??? Hell nooooo)

(From India Today magazine, originally published in the Oct 9 2006 issue)





Unsual for this part of the year

They say the temperature today is 17 deg celcius, 5 deg lower than the normal. It's rather unsual for the air to be this chilly at this time of the year. While driving today I could feel the "Delhi ki Sardi" effect. It was "Cold". And its unlike Poona's cold where its cold but not cold as in winters, especially not at all like Delhi's winters. I miss it but for some reason I'm not sad to be back in Delhi. I see a future, I see myself growing here in all aspects as I deem a person should. I don't feel to have lost anything in transition.
Two occassions bumper to bumper rather leaves you with a tired feeling, but... I'm not tired. It was sister's B'day and after a long time we had a get together. Had friends and relatives over with some chilled Dew and amazing Daal Makhni. I can't even tell how many people were congratulating my cousin Rupa on that amazing Daal she made. Not to mention the Dahi Wadas. But the best part were the chinese "magic" candles, me and Aunt accidentally bought, that refuse to doze off after repeated attempts to extinguish them.






It's office time tomorrow and also the french classes (of which I'v already missed a lot). I'll be working on the pages tomorrow as it's in the final stages of desiging. I'm glad I'm getting to learn both reporting and page designing (which wouldn't have been the case had I hadworked in a large setting).

Diwali went off well though I didn't had the energy nor the enthu to burst any crackers at all (I'm sure somebody's already doing my part). My bed in full of gifts we recieved for Diwali, from the family size Kurkure pack to the dinner set, Diwali (atleast once a year) makes us feel and we have so many acquaintances (even though many are temporary).

Many don't even know the significance of Diwali for Sikhs. Its not only the day to commemorate the lying of the foundation stone of Golden Temple Gurudwara but is also celebrated to celebrate the release of the Sixth Guru of the Sikhs Guru Hargobind Singh. On this day (according to the Hindu or Nanakshahi Calander I guess) the Guru was released from the clutches of Mughals Emperor Jehangir. Therefore, a traditional Diwali day for Sikhs consists of going to the Gurudwara (usually in the evening, putting some candle at the Gurudwara and to put the remaining ones at your home) distributing sweets and gifts to the neighbour followed by crackers (or in my case some music and sleep, which im also going to do right now). Off goes my arse to bed.


Friday, October 20, 2006

Delhi Ki Sardi

It's here. No I don't have dengue ( i can hardly spell it even though it's all around in Delhi). It's the winter. Today while travelling back from the ridge to chankyapuri I could feel it and I also missed my gray jacket (Oh! it protected me and turban from Poona rains). So its here but only the windcheater can do for the moment, a thick jacket is not required.
Delhi's winters are no ordinary winters. I have heard even people from colder countires whining about (I hope Anne never reads this) how Delhi's winter "gets inside their skin like needles." The steets especially in the suburbs are deserted by 8 and there is less traffic on the roads. But it makes for a perfect drive in the night. In summers its still lively and people on roads even at 1 in the night, not so in winters.
I didn't even switch on the fan today when i came back home and the floor also seems cooler without the slippers. So I guess from now on its the winter knocking. I love traveling through the ridge though in winters it will be deserted. Its diwali time tomorrow and I need to distribute gifts before going to the office (yes im working half day tomorrow). So its bye bye time guys.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Feminism Machismo and the Victim Culture

See this picture, not that one didn't know it but to appear on the cover page of Time of India is phenomenal. It a sign of inequalities not only economical but others too. But aren't we all fighting in this modern world to eliminate or atleast decrease inequalities? At times looking from a psychological prospective I feel we are not only creating a bigger wedge between the have and the have not we are also dividing those sitting on the fence.

More and more are we building a world where one has to be opinionated and if someone is not, he is dumb or is out of an intellectual conversation. The media encourages us to "Be someone". Being "normal", "ordinary" or "common" is not cool neither in fashion. So then what kind of egalitarian world are we talking about when everybody is encouraged to be "different" and a just-a-face-in-the-crowd personality is not attractive anymore? I call it the death of the ordinary.

Some Screen Shots from Everybody's Fool by Evanescence...

















The video harps on the same issue- a world where everybody has to be somebody. So noone should be ordinary. Infact one of the scenes also depicts the "use" of women for glamorous purposes, how they are used as showthings in the name of fashion.

The other day I went to vasant vihar to see a bunch of people from a group called Black Noise (the name gives me bouts of depression), the group claims to confront eve-teasing with some out of the box ideas(one of which is this ), its a letter they hand over to many of the people using the South Extn. subway in Delhi. Umm good idea I'd say. If I look at this act from a very conservative prospective I'd rather end up ask the girls the same questions as many fathers or brother would -Why did you had to go to such a crowded place at first place? But hey I'll refrain, thinking that I'll be called a chauvinist pig. Ideally if I talk to my parents that im being mistreated at a place they'll advise me not to go there. It's a very typical Indian approach, "don't like it? Lump it". But this generation is not as passive as my parents I guess. I heard Suketu Mehta (yeah the Gujju dork who wrote Maximum City) say this as a reply to Naomi Wolf's lecture on feminism at the India Today Conclave and I reproduce parts from his speech "We can't look to our fathers for guides to how we interact with women today. We're not sole providers anymore; it's equally likely that a woman will put food on the table, and expect her man to chop and cook it. We're expected to have an equal share in parenting, but the courts are stacked against men in most custody disputes". And I cannot agree more, this generation is not brought up with the same values as was my mother's generation, this generation has picked up lessons as much from the "K" soaps (they really don't have any lessons to begin with apart from some frustrated soccor moms indulging in cheap tricks for cheap thrills) as from Sex and the City. He goes on to say "What's happening in India today is not the same thing as what happened in America in the '60's and '70s. Indian men and women don't have to follow the American example. We don't have to be that polarized; we don't have to be power feminists or machistas. We have our own understanding of each other, which is complex and subtle, and time-tested." Again, I cannot stop nodding. The relationship Indian men share with Indian men is not the same as western men share with western women. Therefore forcing western feminism (there is even difference between forms of feminism in America) cannot only be judged as a foolish acts by some frustrated Indian women who are virtually talking male bashing and not feminism per say. By propagating women as "different" from men (and therefore needs to maintain a different path) what are we doing? Are we creating equality or are we just wedging them further? Same goes with the OBCs and Muslims ( I know I shouldn't mix them). So by recognizing that OBCs are (or were) suppressed and underprivileged and therefore needs different treatment in the hands of law aren't we isolating them from the "others". It also creates a feeling of frustration amongs those who are not given the same treatment just coz they don't fall into that catagory by virtue of their birth. In all the three cases Feminism, OBCs and Muslims we see that whoever falls in this category is isolated by the others, so though they get the velvet treatment in many places but they are ghettoized in the main stream (Muslims and OBCs being great examples) as the others see them gaining advantage not on the basis of individual merit but on the basis of collective demerit (religious minority in case of Muslims, people of backward class in case of OBCs). So is this not also part of the Victim Culture? One of the best answer to this question of mine also come from the same speech Suketu Mehta delivered.

Here's a beautiful paragraph he read on why many Indian marriages work inspite of being judged "unequal" by many western minds and I'd like to reproduce it...

"There's a radical difference, of course, between urban Indian women and women in the villages, who are in much more solidly defined sex roles. But we can't just look at the Indian village as a province of superstition, discrimination, and illiteracy. This is the culture that has sustained the world's oldest continuing civilization; there must be something of real value, to both women and men, for it to have lasted so long. I am thinking now of the marriage of my grandparents and parents, both 'arranged' marriages. They are among the happiest marriages I have ever seen, although not quite 'equal' in the western sense. My grandfather ran his jewelry business on the first floor of an old Calcutta building, and my grandmother stayed home on the third floor and cooked and raised six children. As was the custom, not once, in their lifetime, did they say out loud each others' names, but they had no problems talking to each other; shouting, whispering, cajoling, threatening, pleading, singing. They never needed to step out of their roles; they never felt any need to stop becoming man and woman. My grandmother loved my grandfather not in spite, but *because* he was a man, and she liked taking care of him. She knew what he wanted to eat before he even realized he was hungry for it. And my grandfather always loved the pretty girl in my grandmother, the girl he got betrothed to when she was thirteen. Her beauty was no myth for him; he was exalted by it every day. When my grandmother passed away, in her eighties, my grandfather had no more wish to remain on earth. "Your Ba is waiting for me," he kept saying, and followed her in under a year of her passing."

I love him saying this not coz I'm Indian and therefore resolute in liking it but coz it some how spills the beans of any firm relationship, that the best of relationships are perhaps not equal, the master need to have a slave, a husband needs to have a wife (no I'm not comparing a wife to a slave).

Today was a torturous Thursday and I feel I'm almost suffering from TB. The cough has not gone for almost a month (did I tell you I drink a lot of chilled water? hehe). The mag is also in its final stages so this time I might get to do some desktop publishing job as well which is good. I become the jack of all the trades. I still need to conduct atleast one interview for principal speak and a feature on Austraaalian Education ( the lady at IDP never returns the call). Its almost 2 (yeah am doode) and me must get me arse to bed.

Monday, October 09, 2006

KANK: Worth the time?





I still can't believe after wasting 4 precious hours of my life, I have the courage to spend another 30 mins of my time to write about a film I find rediculiously preposterous. Its the King of Romance trying his hand at a more serious yet delicate topic of modern day marriage. And I don't think he could have done worst. Right from the day Shobha De saw the preview she was all gaga over what could have been one of Indian cinema's worst attempt at dealing with Fornification and Adultry(AND NOT DIVORCE).

Apart from a weak script the movie seriously lacks a sence seriousness about the topic. It seems Karan has made it with a confusing vision half-baked with borrowings from the past (which were all non serious issues of love lost and gained) and one borrowed from the so called glitterazzi who find divorce, infidelity and feminism all sub-sets of the "new Woman" coming out of the shakles to her new found liberty.
The first most important scene is where Rani is sitting confused in her wedding Joda thinking if Abhiseikh is the right person for her or not? Is he the person she can spend her lifetime with? At this point SRK enters(so who borrowed from whom? Ekta borrowed from Karan or is it the other way round) to suggest that Rani should go with her gut feeling. Rani obviously doesnt have any. Going with the flow Rani marries Abhi(btw Abhi is as confused as Rani) to found out that he's more or less a spoilt brat! She is perpetually pissed with Abhi's unhygienic habbits. SRK on the other hand is loser kindda football coach with a 'my-career-is-happening' wife. Preity's character again is typically borrowed over from Kal Ho Na Ho 'happy go grumy girl'. This time she turns dark, rather than turning grumpy.




Karan on the larger picture is unable to deal with a subject in a formidable manner. His confusion to make it a melodrama or a 'substance film' with hints of seriousness have fallen flat due to his own perplexity with the story. Also, is the film really about failed relationships or it just about four people so confused with life that they find solace and bits of similarities in whats going on in their life with others. SRK therefore finds solace in Rani and Abhi and Preity start to meet occasionally too hinting that they might hook up too. They don't.
The problem is that the movie raises some real serious questions but the answers(not even one of them) can be located in the movie. Some like... "because women today are much more liberated (remember they live in New York and not New Delhi) men find it difficult to handle their success?". But at the same time Karan forgot to induse even a single New Yorker characteristic in any of the characters apart from loading them I Love New York t-shits, I-pods (and in case of Big B with blonde girls being potrayed as loose and bimbos).
So how can Karan deal with characters shown with typical conservative Indian mentality, born and brought up in New York but deal with everything as if they are from Jhumri Tallia? So there's also a contrast, when it comes to the outer structures of characters they are all western in both look and outlook but when its comes to dealing with relationships they become as Indian as it gets. And Karan through his film has been unable to explain this contrast. Infact to me the only character worth talking about is not SRK or Preity but its Amitabh( duuno why he looks like pimp all through out the movie) who through his sharp and witty comments impresses everyone and the only one in the movie to have a SOUL... Thanks and Alvida....
PS: (As Paul would have said: its ok but who the hell gonna bring me back those 4 precious hours of my life I wasted watching this movie with torturous Haryanvis)

KANK Rediff Review

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Goddess'


The Pandaal


Goddess Durga(Centre) Lakshmi and Saraswati

It was nothing like the Ganesh Chaturthi festival of Maharastra I was in at this point in Poona last year but we all reluctantly went to see the Durga Pooja last night. To start with we were put off with the looooooooooooooog traffic jam that was around the place, add to that a huuuuuuuuuuuge line outside the "Pandaal"(place where the Pooja is held). Oh trust me it WAS huge about 200 people outside the Pandaal. Mom sneaked in making a beeline of her chamkila dress and asked me to join in. Thankfully noone in the back shouted. Sis joined in too. Dad felt uninterested and stayed out (he's always the wise man).
Inside? nothing to cheer about. Mom was horrified to see people taking walking up the Goddess durga in their foot wear (she even get horrified to see people taking their footwear inside a church haha). Ok no joking. The inside was beautiful but crowded, nothing more than a place to "enjoy" rather than a place to worship. A live band, popular hindi songs and a food court bigger than the Pandal itself. Well we got out cheap. A night out to see Durga Pooja 200 bucks,waiting to get your car packed 25 bucks. Trying to get Dad in all of this... Priceless. There are somethings money can't buy for everything else therez MasterCard.
Went to Def Col late in the night and proved to be the last cutomer of the resturant @ 12 haha. But not a bad evening after all. Only if we had got the timing right Yallah Yallah Yallah!



Mum n' Sis



A Hasseled TV Reporter

Check out the other piX here >>Flickr

Jai Durga Ma!